OBLIVION

The wind as cold as ever brushes past me, my hair discovers freedom for the first time. I open my hands welcoming the cold wind into my shivering body. The unexplainable sensation releasing a pool of endorphins, a state of extreme bliss, I feel my body tighten under the influence of all the bodily fluids coursing through me. I’m in an ecstatic state of euphoria.

I remember the first time when I was this cold. I deliberately forgot my sweater. It was Christmas Eve and I was out, alone. I could hear people conversing, people laughing, people shouting forgetting their life before Christmas, forgetting the problems. A couple fighting over whether Santa was evil or not, based on some Facebook post.

I’ve always seen myself as different from everyone else. Everybody has also seen me differently. I was the weird kid. I didn’t talk much or do much. I liked being in my own world. The world where no one really cared about anything, a world where anything was possible. All I ever wanted was some peace. That’s why I deferred from talking.

I like taking long walks, listening to slow music observing the works of our creator. The beauty of it all astonishes me. How was all this made possible? How was one person or a… I don’t know? An entity… able to create all this? It is so foolish just to leave this all to chance and “Science”. There has to be an architect.

At home, I have a dad who’s an atheist and a mom who’s… a scientologist thanks to Tom Cruise. Yes, Tom Cruise. Being the only child, I was often the scapegoat for their debates and fights, with every one of their fights ending with me on the floor. I didn’t cry or react. I’ve seen people with conditions worse than mine.

The speed of the wind increases. It’s colder. My eyes start to water blurring my vision. A bird flies past me chirping, it’s a mockingbird I think. I’ve heard that chirp before. I want to meet the architect. I want to meet my creator, the creator of everything. Only two more floors left. As I hit the pavement, the beauty of the world, my world flashes before my eyes and I fade into the oblivion…